Buying Jeans

According to me, Jeans are the most comfortable things on earth.. There are so many things that make them so lovable:

1. They don't need to be washed often. (Rather we choose not to wash them.. and its not such a bad thing)
2. It looks better when its torn.. so we don't need to yell at that stray nail on which the new jeans got caught and tore.
3. Anything looks good on it..
4. Color is really not an issue because it becomes a muddy brown eventually anyway due to the non-washing and constant dirtying
5. Brand is not an issue if you choose to not tuck your t shirt/shirt, no one can see the tag.. you can just as well say its Dolce & Gabbana, people will buy it :-)
6. Most convenient while travelling. Even if its a 5 day trip, 2 pairs of jeans and 6 t shirts will make do. The bag wont be brimming with clothes.
7. If it rains and u fold your jeans, it doesn't look like you've borrowed a rickshaw man's pants, its fashionable! Additionally, you can fold your jeans anyway - it still qualifies as a fashion statement
8. Always always always! keep your old jeans. Do NOT discard! Why? - If boot cut is in for 5 months, skinny jeans are in for the next 5, straight cut for the next 5, low rise for the next 5 and high waist for the next 5 and so on... Whether history repeats itself or not, jeans fashion does. Better to save those jeans to avoid unnecessary expenses when they are back in 'vogue'.

Despite all the niceties associated with jeans, there is always a problem when it comes to purchasing them. Common problems I face -

"Its too tight around the waist.. I want the next size" - Next size will 99% not be available. sigh

"Length is not enough, it looks like I am wearing my 5'5'' inch cousin's jeans.. do u have length options" - Again not available. sigh

"A different color?" - Not available. sigh

"Very loose at the thighs" - Tighter ones are not available. sigh

"Low waist?" - no? sigh

"Skinny jeans?" - no? sigh

"Its perfect! I'll take it!! " - Rs.2100?? no..sigh

Maybe I'll wait till the next sale comes up.

Common problems in buying the most comfortable things on earth. But at the end of it, they are SO worth it! :-)

..p..

And the bubble gets smaller..

As you grow older there are several things that come into your scope of activities. Unfortunately many that we don't actually like - responsibilities, bills, money, family obligations, attending functions, the ticking of the biological clock which is directly correlated to marriage and so on. One of the most despised things from my end is the shrinking sample size of boys.

Today when I look at a guy on the road, there are several things that run in my mind .. though I am doing nothing but just 'looking' at him.

Optimistic Scenario:

• Maybe he is doing his masters.. so must be around my age.. well..
• Whoa - I didn't know guys had a sense of fashion.

Pessimistic Scenario:

• Look at his outfit - must be in college or maybe just out of college.. either way out of my league
• Seems preoccupied .. must have a girlfriend

Most Pessimistic Scenario:

• In some angle he looks like he is in school
• Observe his body language.. he's a toddler!
• Walks like a wet dog
• Too much attitude! he is SO rejected!

Worst case scenario

• His wife is standing behind him

This was SO not the case when I was in college, everyone was eligible.. age was not the area of concern it was more of how he looks. Now the guys who come into my bubble should be above 25 years of age, taller than me (big problem), SINGLE, NOT married, decent looking, sensible, hell.. what am I thinking??.. my bubble just shrunk to the size of a peanut.. and *pop* it just burst.

- The genuine ramblings of an 'adult girl' (seems like an oxymoron by itself)

Where are the boys I say!

..p..

P.S - I think now you know why my previous post turned out to be one helluva imaginative post.

Too many don't you think?

Once a friend of mine walked into class late, with a handbag that could fit nothing more than a pencil in it. Our professor stopped her and asked -

Prof - Is this how you come to college?
X - *blinks* huh? *Are my clothes torn?*
Prof - What are u carrying?
X - A bag.. *duh*
Prof - What's in it? Do you have any books at all? Where's your accounts book?
X - *confidently* Its in D's bike :D
Prof - And when will it walk from D's bike to your class?
X - *stumped* err..
Prof - What about your marketing notes?
X - We dont have marketing class
Prof - *Shit!* What about your management class notes?
X - Its with Y
Prof - If all your books are with others why the hell are you in class? And what is that excuse of a bag you're carrying? Get out!
X - *unlucky bag.. must get rid of it*

Since I travel by share auto, I see many women. I observe the way they accessorize, their clothes, hair-do, body language,etc.. I realized that many women carry a handbag, the size of brick. They carry their cell phone in their hands.. because the PM can call them anytime. Their lunch box in the other hand and an umbrella tucked into their armpit because it obviously cannot fit into the dumb bag. Oh! I forgot the 10x10 cm handkerchief forcefully shoved into one palm. Top it all, hands need to be free at regular intervals to adjust the dupatta.. Left side dupatta falling.. right side dupatta falling.. hair falling on face.. my my.. how many hands needed?

My question is - Why cant you just carry a bag big enough to put all your stuff in? Is it not fashionable?? Big bags are very 'In' aren't they? And with all your luggage you sit next to me acting as though I occupy a lot of space! Biladys

..p..

P.S - I wonder whats in the bag if almost everything is held in the hands..

X-(

Boys are stupid!

..p..

The road to fitness.. ain't a bed of roses!

Aerobics is definetly not as easy as it looks! Its tough man! I realized I have zero co-ordination between my hands and legs. If my legs go right, my hands say left and refuse to listen.. I look like a retard who is trying so hard to not to look like one! Finally when we were through after what seemed to look like a 5 hour workout.. my instructor says 5 mins break guys.. I am like WTF?? its not over..? Looked at the clock and realized that just 30 mins had gone by! ZOink!!!

After a point, I was so lost.. I started laughing at myself.. only to hear my instructor yell "Cmon newcomers (ME) be serious!" I think it was at that point that I confirmed to the rest of my class that I was a retard. L.H.S = R.H.S

After the endless class, I couldn't feel my hands.. or legs.. I felt like jelly.

Just to make me feel the opposite, the next day I felt like I had a 5 kg stone inserted into my calf muscles and 10 kg stones into my insignificant biceps. Still cant raise my hands above my shoulder! I can't wear a t-shirt! Its painful I say!

Even after all this, I went for class today.. I am brave .. salute me.. all of u!

..p..

New Addition to Girly Crap

Adding on to my woes is a new allergy. Realized I have eruptions on my face too.. which means more good news to me! I have to wear a stupid jacket to protect my arms.. put stupid sunscreen and top it all wear a stole too to cover my mouth and to avoid the allergy from spreading! I look like a terrorist.. really.. A terrorist with a serious lack of fashion sense and color co-ordination!Plus I carry a backpack.. which looks like an ideal place to hide the bomb.

So.. If I am not blogging for a while.. do understand that I have been arrested and bail me out!

..p..

P.S - I am NOT a terrorist! I am just a poor girl with too many issues :-(

Girly Crap

You know.. its tough being a girl. I truly think that's an understatement by itself. I am not gonna go into sentimental bullshit.. rather I'll stick to more of the external appearance part of it. Probably delve a bit deeper into that part. Sigh.. the things we have to do to look the way we do.. however good/bad that maybe!

Waxing
How does it feel to have hot wax on your skin and have it pulled off a second later?? Not good boys.. not good at all. I wish I had my mom's genes in terms of hair growth instead of my dad's. God played a cruel joke on me.. Dont laugh at me up there!

Threading
If waxing is excruciating pain in the fast forward mode, threading is excruciating pain in slow motion. There.. that explains it.

Facial
Unlike many traveling in a/c cars.. zero exposure to sunlight people, I am not lucky. Plus I tan easily.. (this is an extension to god's cruel joke) Therefore, arises the need to do facials. This is where my mom steps in.
Mom: "I read that its good to apply ground potato on ur face"
Me: "Oh! So?? "
Mom: "So I've ground some and kept for you to apply on your face.. *Splat!!* Now keep that on for 30 mins"
Me: "Mom! It itches!!!"
Mom: "Bear with it and dont do so much drama"
Me: *Scratch Scratch*

1 day later
Mom: "X Aunty told me that cream of milk is good for your skin.. "
Me: *Showing my face*
Mom: *Splat!*
Me: "Gooey Shit!"

2 days later
*Splat!*

3 days later
*Splat!*

Splatty splatty splat!!!!!!!!!

Pedicures
Flash news: I have ugly feet.. need to get them 'cleaned' at the parlour. Atleast this is a pleasurable process.. so no problem. :-)

Nailpolish
Something I have to do to make my self look girly. Not only is the damn thing hard to apply.. it chips off in 2 days and I have to use colors to make myself look girly in different ways!

Hair care
God has blessed me with not so nice hair too. Everytime there's a stupid function I've got to sit in the parlour and let them fix my hair. 45 mins! pulling and tugging. Plus Rs.400 :-(

Scaly skin
Answer - Pumice Stone. Rubbing a stone on ur ankles and feet is not exactly fun. That too everyday!

Creams
My favorite part! Why do they have 10,000 skin creams dammit??? I dont even know what those things do! There's mosituriser, there's body lotion, there's a day cream, a night cream, there's a toner, there's cleansing milk, there's a face pack, there's a scrub, there's a hydrating cream, there's a make-up removing cream..... I dont even know the names of the rest! And I need to use these things for glowing skin.. plus there are a 1000 brands that seem the same to me! Graaaaaaaaaah!!!

Make-up
Another favorite area. Eye-liner, kajal, mascara, eye-shadow, eye-lash curler.. Do you stupid boys know how difficult it is to apply eye-liner and kajal??? Its irritating! Lipstick, lip liner, gloss, plus I have to match these colors with my stupid outfit. Foundation, concealer, blush, feels like sandpaper on my face.. too much makes me look like a plastic doll.. too less.. well whats the point??!

Footwear, Clothes, Accessories
Co-ordination.. big time must! Else .. walking fashion disaster. What do I know about fashion?? Umm.. well :-)

Allergy
I have freakin sunlight allergy! I am allergic to sunlight! Why cant I be allergic to shellfish?? Why sunlight? Which means even if its 44 degress C, I need to wear a jacket to cover my hands and neck and carry an umbrella to protect my face wherever I go. I forget one of these.. and I get these pretty looking eruptions.. all over the exposed area! Once again.. thanks for tht too god!

Bags
Fashionable or not.. Screw u.. I'll only carry a backpack.

Its sad.. that despite the fact that we hate you.. we still do all of the above and more.. Just to look good for you. Stupid boys.. I hate you all!

..p..