Ahem..

With multiple layers of clothing to protect my allergy-prone body, I got into the share auto y'day. Pretty empty.. and I was glad the driver didn't cut short his destination due to the lack of enough passengers (Normally, if there aren't too many, he just says get down some 2-3 stops before the destination and says he wont go beyond this.. pfft. seller's market it is!).

Finally, when my stop did come, I gave him exact change of Rs.15 instead of doing what I always do - I hand over a Rs.100 note with a sheepish grin while he glares hoping I'd never got in! Despite rendering exact change, he called me towards the driver's seat. I was like 'dude I gave u exact change.. now what?' He insisted that I come over. Blinking, I went to his side and he was like -

'Madam cine field le interest irukka?' (Translation-Are u interested in the cine field?)
Me - ' :O what?'
'Interest irukkuna sollunge madam' (Translation-If you have interest tell me madam)
Me - 'Thanks.. but ille' (Translation-Thanks.. but no)
'Okay madam.. thanks'

There was only one thing in my head.. how did he manage to think I had a shot (even if it was for the role of the vegetable seller or some extra who hangs around int he background) under those layers of clothing. I looked like a member of the Taliban.. only 2 eyes visible. Well.. maybe he thought I had mesmerising eyes ;-) .. Who am I kidding!

Yeah.. well it was really weird.!
End.of.story

..p..

Weird nick names!

Be it school or college, I've had my set of goofy friends who love to stupid crazy things..and carrying that forward, I have worked in two companies and both have provided me with a like-minded set of friends/colleagues.. whatever :P

Something we always do is name the people around us based on looks/characteristics/language/body language (yes.. we are a discriminating lot!). I was just thinking of the names that we had come up with and thought it would be pretty interesting to note them down. (Actual identities will NOT be disclosed)

From college:

• Kosu (mosquito)
• Jannal (Window)
• IO (Instant Orgasm)
• Sams
• Bulb
• Puppy
• Jam Bun
• Vardha
• Blob

From post graduation:

• Bulb mandai
• Aaya mani
• Gumps
• Fish
• Mosquito
• Kooja
• Grinder
• Sips
• Machan
• Anda
• Dori
• Glamor Queen

From office #1

• Oriya
• Pakoda
• Nethralaya
• Banana
• It
• Bit
• Topa
• Moss
• Toss
• Germs
• Bijya
• Korangu Mooju (Monkey face)
• Feminine Gender

From office #2

• Traffic
• Satti
• Muttai Payya (Egg boy)
• Fruit boy
• Eye candy
• Bhondu
• Jiggy
• Bedsheet
• Kams
• Creep
• Ms.Orgasmic
• Oblaqy

I am sure there are tons more and I can't think of it..will update as I remember. Till then, read 'em and ponder over who's who ;)

..p..

I am ME.. and I am proud of it

I was watching the movie 'Runaway Bride' the other day and suddenly this morning a certain dialogue popped into my head. I think I found it relevant because I see a lot my friends/acquaintances/family having a similar character.

In the movie Richard Gere is a reporter who meets all the guys Julia Roberts has left at the altar and interviews them on various aspects. One particular question he asks everyone is - "how does she like her eggs?" As odd as it seems, I actually watched the entire movie (the movie as such is not so inspiring even for a chick flick) to know why he asked that to every guy she has ditched.

In a moment of 'repressed emotions letting go' sort of a confrontation, he tells Julia Roberts why he asked that. To every guy she has been with, she has made him believe that she likes the same kind of eggs as he does. Which goes on to prove that, with no guy has she been her own self. She has gone to such an extent to believe that she is what the guy wants but at the altar, its a different story. She cannot imagine living a life with a guy with whom she is not entirely herself that she decides to run away.

In fact, Gere mentions that she likes to make a guy believe that she is the one for him. Not in a deceptive way.. but because she thinks that what she is..momentarily.

Atleast Julia Roberts decided by the end of the movie that she has to be herself. But in reality, there are plenty of people who have given up so much of themselves that they do not have any individuality left. It could be due to the fear of the society, due to lack of understanding of oneself, low confidence but most importantly, its because of constant convincing that this is the only way to be happy.

Its sad that the many of the educated people are this way especially in terms of relationships. Fear of being alone. That fear has dug in so deep that some cannot imagine being single and get into multiple relationships. Some lose identities in relationships and wriggle out when it comes to taking things forward because they cannot imagine spending their life that way (Like Runaway Bride). Some don't even take time to explore themselves.. to understand who they really are.

The whole point of education is to make prudent decisions and understand oneself. It gives us the ability to realize that its okay to be heard and noticed for being what you are instead of getting lost in the crowd.

Relationships are the biggest excuse to hide from surfacing. Not all of course.. generalization would be unjust. But, I know the extent of truth in it because I was one of those people.. who hid under the shield of a relationship shying away from exploring my own self.

Every relationship be it with ur family, with a friend, with a boyfriend/girlfriend, has to give room for your individuality. You have nothing to gain by impressing someone who you dont really care about. Don't lose it, its your biggest strength.

And contrary to what the 'elders' say - losing individuality is not called COMPROMISE! A fine line exists .. see it!

-Been there.. done that

For most of the society, marriage is the single most defining milestone in a person's life.

And its bugging the hell outta me! I HATE THIS!

The large hole in my pocket

There is a large hole in my pocket. It seems to stare at me every month around the same time. It has cold, piercing eyes that make me twitch. It makes me want to go back in time and withold myself from spending that extra 100 bucks on the bloody auto.. or the new pair of pyjamas that I could've done without, or the new slippers that don't look so new anymore or a 100 other things. The temptation to touch my savings is creeping in.

Btw, someone close to my heart wants to say 'hi' -

"Hey everyone, I am Priya's bank account. I mostly make her happy only on the day she receives her pay and then she curses me for being a drain pipe. It's barely my fault. I have a 3 digit balance now, and she has queued up so many things - 800 bucks to fix her comp, 500 bucks for her friend's wedding gift, plus tons of expenses when her mom goes outta town and Nitesh's constant need to have a phone recharge done only through me. That is approximately 2000 bucks debit on me. How am I supposed to help her if she lacks the fundamental ability to comprehend basic mathematics!! And she says I am the drain pipe.. she is the one with the drain pipe fitted into her peanut brain. I got to go now.. she's started cursing me now and this will continue till 31st of August (pay day).. Bye all!"

I guess I must've avoided the introduction.. well I am a dunce! welcome to my world of bankruptcy...

..p..

Buying Jeans

According to me, Jeans are the most comfortable things on earth.. There are so many things that make them so lovable:

1. They don't need to be washed often. (Rather we choose not to wash them.. and its not such a bad thing)
2. It looks better when its torn.. so we don't need to yell at that stray nail on which the new jeans got caught and tore.
3. Anything looks good on it..
4. Color is really not an issue because it becomes a muddy brown eventually anyway due to the non-washing and constant dirtying
5. Brand is not an issue if you choose to not tuck your t shirt/shirt, no one can see the tag.. you can just as well say its Dolce & Gabbana, people will buy it :-)
6. Most convenient while travelling. Even if its a 5 day trip, 2 pairs of jeans and 6 t shirts will make do. The bag wont be brimming with clothes.
7. If it rains and u fold your jeans, it doesn't look like you've borrowed a rickshaw man's pants, its fashionable! Additionally, you can fold your jeans anyway - it still qualifies as a fashion statement
8. Always always always! keep your old jeans. Do NOT discard! Why? - If boot cut is in for 5 months, skinny jeans are in for the next 5, straight cut for the next 5, low rise for the next 5 and high waist for the next 5 and so on... Whether history repeats itself or not, jeans fashion does. Better to save those jeans to avoid unnecessary expenses when they are back in 'vogue'.

Despite all the niceties associated with jeans, there is always a problem when it comes to purchasing them. Common problems I face -

"Its too tight around the waist.. I want the next size" - Next size will 99% not be available. sigh

"Length is not enough, it looks like I am wearing my 5'5'' inch cousin's jeans.. do u have length options" - Again not available. sigh

"A different color?" - Not available. sigh

"Very loose at the thighs" - Tighter ones are not available. sigh

"Low waist?" - no? sigh

"Skinny jeans?" - no? sigh

"Its perfect! I'll take it!! " - Rs.2100?? no..sigh

Maybe I'll wait till the next sale comes up.

Common problems in buying the most comfortable things on earth. But at the end of it, they are SO worth it! :-)

..p..

And the bubble gets smaller..

As you grow older there are several things that come into your scope of activities. Unfortunately many that we don't actually like - responsibilities, bills, money, family obligations, attending functions, the ticking of the biological clock which is directly correlated to marriage and so on. One of the most despised things from my end is the shrinking sample size of boys.

Today when I look at a guy on the road, there are several things that run in my mind .. though I am doing nothing but just 'looking' at him.

Optimistic Scenario:

• Maybe he is doing his masters.. so must be around my age.. well..
• Whoa - I didn't know guys had a sense of fashion.

Pessimistic Scenario:

• Look at his outfit - must be in college or maybe just out of college.. either way out of my league
• Seems preoccupied .. must have a girlfriend

Most Pessimistic Scenario:

• In some angle he looks like he is in school
• Observe his body language.. he's a toddler!
• Walks like a wet dog
• Too much attitude! he is SO rejected!

Worst case scenario

• His wife is standing behind him

This was SO not the case when I was in college, everyone was eligible.. age was not the area of concern it was more of how he looks. Now the guys who come into my bubble should be above 25 years of age, taller than me (big problem), SINGLE, NOT married, decent looking, sensible, hell.. what am I thinking??.. my bubble just shrunk to the size of a peanut.. and *pop* it just burst.

- The genuine ramblings of an 'adult girl' (seems like an oxymoron by itself)

Where are the boys I say!

..p..

P.S - I think now you know why my previous post turned out to be one helluva imaginative post.

An unexpected twist in an ordinary trip

I am gonna break away from my paragraph blogs into something more detailed because I need to do justice to the string of events that happened during my highly eventful trip.

It started out as just another family trip .. just that my nephew joined the bandwagon. A boring train journey and hot weather to greet us at the other end of the journey. After quickly finishing breakfast, we headed out to my dad's native town to start the holy temple visiting.

Dressed in a boring salwar looking more like fruitcake, we headed out. Once we reached we checked into a hotel. Very nice place overlooking the sea.

As I just stopped for a minute to gaze out of the balcony to admire the beautiful blue ocean staring at me with enviable serenity, my eyes just strayed off to the ground and there I saw what was probably the most mysterious yet powerful eyes ever. He was breath takingly handsome. Our eyes met for just a few seconds and I had trouble lifting my gaze off to avoid drooling on his face. Casting stolen glances at him I looked away wondering if I'll ever see him again. Then my mom bellowed.. had to oblige. So I ran back into my room.

We took 2 rooms to accommodate our extended family and I was the ward boy. Had to run between the two rooms to deliver personal messages, schedules, food, water and huggies for the little one. Just when I thought I'll hit the bed, my mom sends me off another delivery to the other room. Sloppily, rubbing my eyes I dragged myself and bumped into someone as the darkness temporarily misled me. In other words, I was 'Sleep-Drunk'. I heard a deep voice say 'Whoa.. I am sorry, I didn't quite see you'. As I tilted my head to see 1) who's the dude with good English in this part of the state? 2) who's the guy taller than me? - I saw those mesmerising eyes again. This time our eyes met for more than a few seconds (I know it sounds like a movie.. but bear with it.) We had a smile on our faces, acknowledging the previous encounter. I started stammering and stuttering.. not able to conjure up anything intelligent to say. Finally after saying 'Err..' for 10 secs continuously, I asked wat I wanted to know - "You stay in this floor?" .. He smiled coz he knew what I was thinking. He said "Yeah..I stay in room 149.. I am here with my sis and mom..temple visiting" I said "I am here temple visiting too :-) with my family". Not knowing what to say after that we just said 'goodnight' and drifted off.

When I went to bed I was thinking of him invariably - He was tall.. around 6 ft.. wheatish complexion, dark hair, eyes that speak volumes, well built, broad chest.. all-in-all .. godly!! Tired and exhausted, I dozed off.

I woke all groggy and I see noone's in the room. Everyone left to see the sunrise without me. Grr.. I always get left behind. I grumpily washed up and suddenly got reminded of Mr.Godly. I was in 148.. he was in 149.. so I opened the door and looked to my right with just my head popping out of the door. The door was slightly ajar and I tried to get a clearer view. Engrossed in my efforts, I didn't hear the footsteps behind me. I suddenly hear an 'ahem' right behind me. With a sheepish look, I turned to see him standing .. again.. I began fumbling for words.. and managed to bring the rest of my body out of the door. I began with 'errr...' routine when he said "I know you were looking for me".. Defensively I said 'NO'..ignoring me he continued saying "Well.. here I am.. Why were u looking for me?".. I was dumbstruck, at a complete loss for words "Don't assume things.. I just wanted to know who was in the next room".. He just said "Next time alter your expression to make me buy that lie" and walked past me. I was flushed.. totally flushed. I was taken aback.. by his guts.. his charm and his confidence. I decided to stay put in the room till my parents return to avoid further embarrassment.

A little while later, I heard voices outside the door. I peeked again despite the 'risks' to see him talking to my parents. I was .. err.. 'worried'. Was he complaining? Ayyo! My mom will kill me! After a painful and worrisome 5 minutes, my parents enter all laughing.. Thought bubble - *Atleast they wont kill me*. My mom said "We were talking to this boy next door .." Me thinks *and....* "they wanted to know how to go about the temple visit.. so me and dad asked them to join us". Me thinks *Am I supposed to be happy? or sad?.. I am confused for now*.

The evening came and we headed off to the temple. He didn't act like he knew me and I was wondering why. Then started the glance exchanging. Everytime I shot off a glance at him, he was there almost anticipating my look. There was this spurt of butterflies running wild in my stomach everytime that happened. This continued all through the evening till we reached the room. All this while he didnt utter a word.. just general acknowledgement and tons of glances. I thought maybe he didn't want to come off as needy so didn't try anything. Just picturing some movie scene , I headed off to the terrace to catch the full moon. We were supposed to leave early next morning. I thought like the hero in the movie, he would also sense that I was in the terrace and come. But he didn't. I sighed and came down when as usual I bumped into him. He said "Varun" .. I was like "eh?".. "That's my name" he said. "I am Priya". "Coming up or going down?" he asked. I lied saying I was going up..So I can spend sometime with him.

After some "err"s we struck up sensible conversation. After some kadalai frying, we were heading back our rooms when he decided to help me down the wall I was perched upon. He held my hand.. for a while more than required and stepped closer to me. I kept telling myself to snap outta it.. for god's sake this is not some movie. But it was almost close to that. We kept looking at each other and me being me.. I started fiddling with my cellphone to avoid the awkwardness and in a desperate attempt to keep my stupid stomach butterflies from flying. We casually exchanged numbers and eluded the romance that was meant to follow by deciding to head back to our rooms.

I finally slept after calming down the butterflies and convincing myself that this is not a dream. I woke up to find just one sms which was from him - It said, "Yesterday was wonderful.. and it was just because of you". I couldn't help but let a smile creep into my face.

We were running late and had to push off. I couldn't see him before we left. But I still had that message that I kept reading over and over again .. hopelessly romantic. When the car was turning away from the hotel , I looked up.. and just saw his silhouette briskly moving. I knew for sure.. he was searching for me. I just left.. wishing that I could relive the previous night.

As fascinating as that sounds .. though that's the trip I would've liked to have, I didn't. Snap outta it people! We (me and my family) just went and visited some temples. I came back with plenty of sunburns, a perfectly terrible tan and the return of my dreaded allergy. Romance? I am glad I can still spell it. :-)

..p..

I am an 'officer'

Today I got my business card. I am super excited.. my first one. Its just that I got a hundred of them and I am not quite sure what to do with it. Err.. I think I have to give my mom..dad..brother.. sis-in-law.. my 1 month old nephew.. servant.. friends.. my corner store guy.. That still leaves me with 82 more!!

Business cards anyone??

..p..

I found my 'hair' twin yesterday (Remember the episode in friends where Joey finds his 'hand' twin?) . Just that it happens to be a guy. Err..

..p..

My work involves Microsoft powerpoint so much that I have started having dreams in slideshows. Ugh..

..p..

My eye candy just asked me to check out the photo of the girl he might end up with. I am searching for a word here that best describes my feelings. Aah.. got it .. 'Heartbroken' !

..p..

I cribbed and cribbed and cribbed and finally managed to finish it and forgot about it. Instead of coming back to haunt me, appreciation came. Fate just did a googly and I am basking in its googliness :-)

..p..

P.S - 'Googly' has nothing to do with 'google'. Its the other one.. Go google it :-P

I am the official railway ticket booker. I book tickets for my mom, dad, brother, neighbour, grandpa, sis-in-law, friends, friends of friends, dogs, cats, lizards and the entire bandwagon. So much so that I was offered a privilege card by the railway authorities. Even the guy who designed irctc.co.in would not have explored the website as much as I have. The blue and white haunts me so much that I have dreams of booking tickets. Thu..

..p..

Trying to fit a 10 day-old baby in a 10 cm radius basket is not custom .. its lack of familiarity with the metric system.

..p..

Waking up to a bad headache, taking back-to-back printouts and realizing that some are the wrong side up, letting irctc.co.in take extra money from my account though I have only a three digit balance, screwing up a cheque and realizing it right after starts raining, running back in the rain to undo the screwyness, getting drenched and having an upset tummy by the end of the day.. Yep that qualifies as a bad day.

..p..

You can tell for sure that its crowded when you have somebody's arm on your shoulder,your leg gets lost in the number of legs around you that you cant find out which one is yours despite the pressing familiarity and your ass is sandwiched between two giant asses (that obviously is someone else's). Add to that deafening noise and oodles of sweat. Thats India for you served on a platter.

Something new

Today, I came across a new style of blogging. I found it rather appealing. Going to implement it. You'll figure it out if you know me well enough :-)

I realized I have only guy friends at work. Wonder what that says about me.

..p..

As on Sunday 14th June 2009, I am officially an Aunt :-)

My nephew rocks!

:D :D :D

..Aunt Priya..

Sucky!

You know.. there are these times when you are all proud and beaming coz' you changed something about you that has been annoying a special someone . And then you want to meet the other person and tell him/her that you HAVE actually changed! .. so when you walk up the road looking like the someone out of the happydent commercial.. wide-grin, bright eyed, like you were the cause of world peace and finally face him/her basically expecting a pat on the back, we have an anti-climax:



All he/she has to say is "Pfft !!!.. you call that change? Well.. If you could actually be nice.. that's a change!"



Yeah.. well.. not quite what I was expecting.

..p..

P.S - Sigh..

Long time no see

Quite often we come stumble upon friends/relatives/acquaintances who we haven't seen for a while. Pretty normal... ordinary circumstances.. What follows is the uneasy part.

At Inox..
Me: Hey!!!
X: Hey!
Me: Its been so long!
X: Yeah ! Long time no see..
Me: So ... how are u?
X: Am good.. working.
Me: Oh! *not interested.. still* Where are u working?
X: at ABC ltd..
Me: Oh thats nice!
X: What about u?
Me: I am working at blah company.

--Many exclamations later..

X: Nice.. so ur here for which movie?
Me: Blah *Please dont come for the same movie.. I dont know wat else to talk about*
X: Oh! I am going for crap movie
Me: *Thank god* Heard its very good..
X: Yeah..
Me: err...
X: err..
Me: Okay then.. enjoy.. looks like its time for your movie..
X: Yeah yeah *Thank god for that*
Me & X: Bye!

-------

Its not like I am not happy to see him/her/them. But after this 2 minute conversation I dont know what else to say. Obviously we are not going to exchange numbers under the pretext of staying in touch.. so that dialogue is out of context. I dont want to know if X is married or single or divorced because 'marriage' is forbidden territory in terms of conversation. 'Kids' is a banned topic. That leaves me only with 'Hi.. how are u and where are u working' and an awkward expression which implies I am hunting for topics to avoid the uncomfortable silence.

The worst was this one time at Satyam when I had gone for 'Gothika' with D. I think D had gone to get popcorn.

Arbit voice - Hey !! Priya .. its been so long since I saw you. How are you?
Me - *Staring and incredibly lost*.. ugh..
Arbit voice - How is everybody?
Me - *Everybody = ??* ugh..

(I haven't said a word all this while to this girl who seeems so glad she bumped into me coz I have no damn clue about who she is! )

D - Hi S !!!
D to me - pssssst thats S from school!
Me - OH! so thats how I know you!
S - You didnt recognize me all this while?
Me to myself - *Dont think aloud!!!*

Already I have a problem with placing people.. then comes the problem of having civilized conversation. How much can a little girl (me) take :-( ?

..p..

Too many don't you think?

Once a friend of mine walked into class late, with a handbag that could fit nothing more than a pencil in it. Our professor stopped her and asked -

Prof - Is this how you come to college?
X - *blinks* huh? *Are my clothes torn?*
Prof - What are u carrying?
X - A bag.. *duh*
Prof - What's in it? Do you have any books at all? Where's your accounts book?
X - *confidently* Its in D's bike :D
Prof - And when will it walk from D's bike to your class?
X - *stumped* err..
Prof - What about your marketing notes?
X - We dont have marketing class
Prof - *Shit!* What about your management class notes?
X - Its with Y
Prof - If all your books are with others why the hell are you in class? And what is that excuse of a bag you're carrying? Get out!
X - *unlucky bag.. must get rid of it*

Since I travel by share auto, I see many women. I observe the way they accessorize, their clothes, hair-do, body language,etc.. I realized that many women carry a handbag, the size of brick. They carry their cell phone in their hands.. because the PM can call them anytime. Their lunch box in the other hand and an umbrella tucked into their armpit because it obviously cannot fit into the dumb bag. Oh! I forgot the 10x10 cm handkerchief forcefully shoved into one palm. Top it all, hands need to be free at regular intervals to adjust the dupatta.. Left side dupatta falling.. right side dupatta falling.. hair falling on face.. my my.. how many hands needed?

My question is - Why cant you just carry a bag big enough to put all your stuff in? Is it not fashionable?? Big bags are very 'In' aren't they? And with all your luggage you sit next to me acting as though I occupy a lot of space! Biladys

..p..

P.S - I wonder whats in the bag if almost everything is held in the hands..

Crushing II

For those of you who have read the post on 'Crushing', there are some updates.

When I almost gave up, contact was established.. and to a large extent so was mutual likey-ness.

But, what am I supposed to do when someone is too naive to understand not only the implications of my statements.. but his too!???

He's a kid.. a sweet one at that.. good looking too.. with the bouncy hair... and so innocent. These are hard to find.. Trust me!

But the naive-ness is killing me!

In a world where kids in Class I are familiar with the 'F' word and courtship begins at Class XI and subtle hints are understood effortlessly, this one is a misfit. Talk about being from the wrong planet!

Sigh...........

..p..

I dreamed a dream

All our inspirational leaders tell us to dream. You know.. the cliched "Dream big/Chase your dreams/Live your dreams" and what not. But, you see I have a problem. I dream when I am not required to dream. Confused? Let me explain. When you are attending a really boring class, you drift off and move into another dimension .. imagine that happens when u really need to be paying attention!

During the interview at my company
So Priya could you tell us about your work experience?
Me: Well certainly.. I started off as a management trainee in HCL..
(Thought bubble) *Oh our Noida trip was so much fun .. Wonder what X is doing now.. How will it be if we make a trip there now*
And uh... uh... yeah I was in the M&A dept...
----------
During aerobics class
Instrcutor - 1..2..3..4.. Free step..
Me: (Thought bubble) *Hey.. I am actually getting the steps.. I remember them too.. Btw what was yday's choreography? Need to get to work soon.. Maybe I should catch a movie this weekend. Sigh.. need to go the parlour this week*

By now my hands are legs have completely lost track of the sequence.. and I stand like a tree.. my feet planted firmly on the ground and I have been staring at nothing.

Instructor - C'mon Priya.. dont stop now .. you can do it.. c'mon c'mon..
Me: Huh.. waa??
------------

You see it?? What do I do now?? I day dream, night dream, evening dream,.. all dreams only..

To dream or not to dream to avoid embarassing situations.. is the big question.

POP! *Bubble burst*

Too many wedding bells.

Looks like girls and boys in my age-group are ripe as hell.

I am attending 7 weddings this month.. Not 1.. Not 2 but.. SEVEN! That's a lot! Everytime I get a a call from someone I barely talk to, I know he/she is calling to yell, "Hey .. Guess what.. I am getting married." I am like "Oh .. Congratulations.. What an unpredictable event!"

Every week I get atleast one mail saying "Another wedding to attend" or "Hi .. I would like to invite all of your for my wedding. Kindly consider this a personal invite and please make it". One girl in particular, who quite obviously didnt want me to attend her wedding sends me a mail like she is asking her manager for leave. "PFA my wedding invite".. who the hell says PFA for a wedding invitation?? Top it all the wedding's in Kerala and I get the invite a few days before the D-Day. Why'd you even PFA ur invite to me lady?

Recently I attended a wedding and met one of my college friends there.
She was like "Hi.. long time.. how're u?"
I notice that in her hand is a baby.
"Oh this is my son. he is one and half months old".
Me - Telling myself *This is a dream.. wake up*. "
"Did you know X is pregnant with her second baby?"
Me - Telling myself *This is not a dream.. its a nightmare. WAKE UP*

Now after the mating, breeding has begun too. (Thats very crude.. but what the hell)

Everytime I attend a wedding, for a second I think "Am I lagging behind?" Then the assurance steps in "This is one race in which I dont mind coming last" :-)

..p..

Random Weekend Updates

• My parents were outta town this weekend and I did absolutely nothing. I must be the oldest and most boring 24 year-old in the world. Dont talk to me.. else my boring 'ness' might catch onto u (assuming its contagious)
• My sis-in-law is pregnant. She's a walking timebomb. My nephew/niece might arrive pretty soon :-) . She keeps giving me gory details about her pregnancy. Feels like a trailer to my future. The wonder of life.. yeah whatever.. Its scary.. Mommy! :O
• I got reminded of my weird fantasy while watching the Chennai Super Kings play. I want Matthew Hayden to carry me :-) I am sure he can carry me effortlessly, with one hand and throw me like a frizby. I am not sure about wanting to be thrown like a frizby though.
• My new fetish is baby clothes for the little one. Oh I cant wait for him/her to be born!!!!! woohoo!
• My mom thinks I am 5 years-old. She still doesn't leave me alone at home! (This kind of contradicts my first point)
• I didn't realize salwar shopping is this hard! Either its too simple or too gaudy or not in my color or not in my price range or looks like someone swallowed chumkies and puked all over the fabric.
• Bored of eating food outside
• I have decided to drink atleast 2 litres of water everyday. Even if nature calls atleast every half hour :-(
• My house is an oven

..p..

Invitation for friendship

Got this one just a few minutes back.

On Mon, May 4, 2009 at 11:43 AM, Ajaya Das <ajayadas.das@gmail.com> wrote:

Hai, I am ajaya. I want to develope friendship with you.

What does he expect me to say?
"Dear Ajaya, Yes! I will co-operate in developing friendship with you too. When can we start the development process? And what about the testing stage? Shall we have an initial dry-run? Also I would like to discuss the cost-benefit details."

They never quite get the right pick-up line :P
I am not saying they totally suck at it.. I just remembered that I fell for one and fell really deep too :D

..p..

P.S - In a matter of minutes, got another another one from Sathish Babu

how r u? i saw ur profile yaar... its very interesting yaar... could u add me as ur friend yaar....

My reply should be 'Shut it yaar' :-)

X-(

Boys are stupid!

..p..

Censor!

Not able to blog.. especially when all that comes out of my mouth are ugly abuses #$#%!!!

Hold on.. while I refine my vocabulary.

..p..

High School Demographics

We watch a lot of firang high school movies and what is immediately noticeable is the set-up. There are a bunch of popular kids, geeky kids, normal kids and the hero/heroine. Though it seems cinematic, it is kinda true isnt it? Lets define the characters:

1. The popular and mean kid - The most handsome guy/girl in class who most of the geeky or almost non-existent kids in the class have a crush on. The popular kid doesn't even know the names of the rest of the kids in class. The popular girl is the one the seniors have their eye on. The only reason why they would even come by your classroom. The popular kids are the reason why your class is noticed.
2. The popular yet nice kid - They are rare. Despite their popularity, they are in touch with reality. They mingle with everyone. They try to remember the names of other kids in class. They fit in without the high and mighty air around them.
3. The geeky kid - Almost disappearing into the books with thick glasses. Not to be seen anywhere without a book. They are glad to be even spoken to anyone from the popular gang. Teacher's pet. Almost always has a crush on the most popular guy/girl. Wants to have a life.. but doesnt know how to.
4. The invisible kids - They dont fall under any category. They are the ones who disappear into the background. Not many kids remember their names.
5. The funny guy - Every class will have a 'funny' guy. The guy who cannot be taken seriously. The guy who's job is to just mock the teachers/other students. Mostly a friend of the popular kids. He is mostly either very thin or plump. He also likes a girl .. but the girl thinks thats a joke too.
6. The dumb-fuck - Extremely stupid. Never passes tests. Manages to scrape through finals. Complains to the teachers when the popular kids tease him. Almost in the category of non-existents.. But infamous.
7. The girly girl - The dainty darling. The one who is over dramatic. Acts like the world's gonna end even if her nail breaks. Expects all the guys to comfort her when her nail breaks. Cries for the stupidest reasons. Attention-seeker.
8. The tom-boy - The girl who noone thinks of as a girl. The almost buddy girl who also has a girly side, but never shows it coz she knows she cant pull it off. Mostly has a crush on the popular kid.
9. The girl-gang - All girls only.. No boys allowed.
10. The boy-gang - All boys only.. No girls allowed.

I saw these demographics not just in high school.. but also carry-forward till post-graduation, to some extent even till my first work-place. Looks like movies are not so over-dramatized after-all.

I personally belonged to the "Invisible kids" gang. I ventured a bit into the "All girl" gang and was the friend of a popular yet nice kid.

Do drop in a comment and tell me which category you fit into :-)

..p..

Crushing!!

• I am all jittery


• Looking for our eyes to meet


• Yearning for that little smile


• Staring at my wardrobe, pondering what would please him


• Butterflies flying left,right and center


• Making loud conversation to draw someone's attention


• Trying to exchange smiles getting bulbs in return


• Oh!! Its that smile.. that adorable smile!!! Sigh.........Droooooool


• He is that extra incentive provided to step outta home


• Its gotta be the hair too.. the way it gently rests on his forehead


• The frustration of not being noticed


• My Mc Dreamy for a Mc While (Reference - Grey's Anatomy)

*Blushes* I am crushing allright :P

P.S - Tips to get noticed are welcome!

Is that what I am??

X talks about a potential love interest

X : You know.. he's sweet...
Me : uh.huh
X : and intelligent...
Me : uh.huh
X : and hilarious!
Me : uh.huh
X : So mature and sensible..
Me : Uh.huh.. Anything else?
X : Well how do I say this.. he is really funny in a dumb way you know.. makes stupid jokes which are funny.. but dumb at the same time and does ridiculous things. Totally DUMB!!
Me : ??? What's that supposed to mean? He's foolish?
X : He's like you.. :-)
Me : *stumped*

Bhargav, my schoolmate, passed away in a freak bungee-jumping accident. I just want to use this space to offer his family my deepest condolences. Though I really wasn't close to him, there is some sort of emptiness that's all around me.

May you rest in peace Bhargav. Will miss you.

Street Kings

I decided to take my cousins out for a movie yesterday. I picked Street Kings.. for the simple reason that Keanu Reeves was in it. I fell in love with him when I saw the Matrix. What a huge mistake that turned out to be. This movie.. Street Kings.. which I for no explainable reason recal as Street Riders is a remake of some Vijaykanth movie! Not in the literal sense.. but the essence of it.. yeah!!

The hero is not a bullet-resistant, walking peace of non-penetrateable armor for cryin' out loud! He gets shot in his arm.. and manages to fight.. get punched in the 'hit' area and still survive.. wake up Mr.Reeves.. its not The Matrix! .. Its not 'your mind makes it real' anymore... it IS REAL! The guy cannot act for nuts.. he has the same deadpan expression everytime. It worked wonders in The Matrix because the character required him to do so.. which I misunderstood as good acting.. looks like he still has the hangover. Plus the person who designed his clothes in the movie is definitely gay.

The music - Have you seen Vikraman movies or Karan Johar movies? Where one song is played in variable speeds. If the junta are happy - Fast version; junta are sad - slow version. This is the same funda followed in this movie. Fast.. slow.. medium-slow..medium fast..faster..sloowwwwww.

Dialogues - This was the easiest part in the movie. There are only 2 words used - 'Fuck' and 'Shit'. Eg - What the fuck is up you mother-fucker? Mind your fucking business you fucking shit.

Cons:

• Keanu Reeves


• Dialogues


• Story (What story?)


• Screenplay


• Music


• Costumes!


• Pace of the movie


• Acting - (Forgot to mention - The guy who plays the chief or whatever.. keeps spitting. Apparently thats the way he talks.)


• What's left?

Pros:

• Keanu Reeves' car


• Detective Disco :-) He was hot!

My expert opinion - DONT WATCH! Resort to Captain Vijaykanth for better nail biting action! :-)

:D :D :D

Me: Lets go! Its getting late for me!
My Brother: Let me start the scooty.
Me: The instant start doesn't work.
My Brother: Duh.. I know. Will kick start.
Me: Fast!
My Brother: Dishhh.. Dissssshhh. Dissss... Your stupid bike doesn't even start
Me: Dont blame my bike !!! X-(
My Brother: Dishh.. Dishh... worthless piece of crap!
Me: You mind?? May I?
My Brother: *Smirking* Like you can.. Dishh.. Dissh..
Me: *Grabbing the bike* Dishhhh.. Vroom vroom...
My Brother: :O
Me: Do I need to say anything? :D
My Brother: Shut up!

Girl Power rocks! :-)

..p..

Err..

Aerobics - Disorientation maxed out

Work - Slack.. slackening.. slackening more

Home Front - Chaos personified

Relationship - Disillusionment..

Friends - Sanity upkeepers

Blogging - Canvas for venting

Blogger Comments - Reassurance.

Me - No Clue!

The road to fitness.. ain't a bed of roses!

Aerobics is definetly not as easy as it looks! Its tough man! I realized I have zero co-ordination between my hands and legs. If my legs go right, my hands say left and refuse to listen.. I look like a retard who is trying so hard to not to look like one! Finally when we were through after what seemed to look like a 5 hour workout.. my instructor says 5 mins break guys.. I am like WTF?? its not over..? Looked at the clock and realized that just 30 mins had gone by! ZOink!!!

After a point, I was so lost.. I started laughing at myself.. only to hear my instructor yell "Cmon newcomers (ME) be serious!" I think it was at that point that I confirmed to the rest of my class that I was a retard. L.H.S = R.H.S

After the endless class, I couldn't feel my hands.. or legs.. I felt like jelly.

Just to make me feel the opposite, the next day I felt like I had a 5 kg stone inserted into my calf muscles and 10 kg stones into my insignificant biceps. Still cant raise my hands above my shoulder! I can't wear a t-shirt! Its painful I say!

Even after all this, I went for class today.. I am brave .. salute me.. all of u!

..p..

New Addition to Girly Crap

Adding on to my woes is a new allergy. Realized I have eruptions on my face too.. which means more good news to me! I have to wear a stupid jacket to protect my arms.. put stupid sunscreen and top it all wear a stole too to cover my mouth and to avoid the allergy from spreading! I look like a terrorist.. really.. A terrorist with a serious lack of fashion sense and color co-ordination!Plus I carry a backpack.. which looks like an ideal place to hide the bomb.

So.. If I am not blogging for a while.. do understand that I have been arrested and bail me out!

..p..

P.S - I am NOT a terrorist! I am just a poor girl with too many issues :-(

Weddings and Friends!

Weddings are so 'IN' right now! Everyone is getting married.. My neighbour, my friends, my cousins, my young aunts, young uncles, old cousin's young children, acquaintances, dogs, cats, mice,ants, lady bugs.. all of 'em I say! But that's not the point..

Yesterday, me and a bunch of my friends (M,J,D and me) went for S's wedding. All were my buddies from undergraduation. As usual.. we did our foolish things, laughed like pigs, acted stupid and giggled over our goof-ups.

We reached the hall at 9:30 hungry as hell.
Me: I am hungry
M: They must be serving breakfast
Me: I guess they should. Let's find out.
Me (to some arbit juice guy): Sappadu enge serve panraange? (Where are they serving food)
Arbit Juice Guy: mfftuuuppwwsdf
Me: What?
Arbit Juice Guy: mfftuuuppwwsdf
Me: Oh! seri seri (Ok ok)
M: What did he say?
Me: No clue

D arrives.
Me and M: Go ask Arbit juice guy about the food
D: I just came!
Me: You want food or not?
D: Well yeah..
M: Then go ask!
D: Ok Ok.. Arbit Juice guy... When breakfast?
Arbit Juice Guy: No breakfast.
Me,M and D: :(

J arrives.
Me: Ask arbit juice guy when they serve lunch.
S: I just came! Why cant you ask?
Me: Bcoz I already asked him about breakfast and I cant understand what he says.
S: Why cant M ask??
M: ok ok! I will ask!
M to arbit juice guy: When lunch?
Arbit juice guy: *stupid glutton girls* In ten mins
M to us: *jubiliant* In 10 mins lunch will be served
All of us: yay!

The second 10 mins was up, we hurried to the dining hall. We were the first ones there. Felt like total PAKKIS. Hogged till the caterer forced D to wrap up as the next lot was waiting to eat.

We were in quite a hurry to leave because we had nothing to do. As the bride and groom were taking their three sacred rounds around the holy fire, we managed to thrust the gift into the bride's hand as she was yelled at by the priest for stopping during the 'sacred' round.

As we were leaving, a guy walked up to me, shook my hands and said, "Hi.. You remember me?" As usual I am clueless. Finally I came to know that he was my junior during post graduation. After a long talk during which D,J and M were laughing hysterically, I managed to leave and asked those idiots why they were laughing so much.

D: That guy was your junior from college?
Me: Yeah..
D: Well.. he managed to recognize you.. But not J who was also your classmate in P.G
All of us: Hahahhahahaha :D
J: That could be because I was turning the other way, maybe he didnt see my face..
All of us: Hahhahahaha :D You wish...

Attending weddings with my friends is so much more fun. Our incentives are boys and food. All we do is sit and pass comments and make complete fools of our ourselves one way or the other :-)

..p..

Two sides of the coin

Yesterday, I was talking to a colleague of mine.. and casually opened the draw at his desk to find lip balm and Garnier 'fairness' facewash! Looks like the guys have resorted to creams as well :-) Next time I might find sunscreen and mascara ...

P.S - I dont want protests from boys saying "What's wrong with 'fairness' facewash?" and all that crap.. Next thing you'll say is "What's wrong with facials?? We need to look pretty.. err handsome too". Then I might be forced to classify such guys under a category.. - 'Gurly boys'

Girly Crap

You know.. its tough being a girl. I truly think that's an understatement by itself. I am not gonna go into sentimental bullshit.. rather I'll stick to more of the external appearance part of it. Probably delve a bit deeper into that part. Sigh.. the things we have to do to look the way we do.. however good/bad that maybe!

Waxing
How does it feel to have hot wax on your skin and have it pulled off a second later?? Not good boys.. not good at all. I wish I had my mom's genes in terms of hair growth instead of my dad's. God played a cruel joke on me.. Dont laugh at me up there!

Threading
If waxing is excruciating pain in the fast forward mode, threading is excruciating pain in slow motion. There.. that explains it.

Facial
Unlike many traveling in a/c cars.. zero exposure to sunlight people, I am not lucky. Plus I tan easily.. (this is an extension to god's cruel joke) Therefore, arises the need to do facials. This is where my mom steps in.
Mom: "I read that its good to apply ground potato on ur face"
Me: "Oh! So?? "
Mom: "So I've ground some and kept for you to apply on your face.. *Splat!!* Now keep that on for 30 mins"
Me: "Mom! It itches!!!"
Mom: "Bear with it and dont do so much drama"
Me: *Scratch Scratch*

1 day later
Mom: "X Aunty told me that cream of milk is good for your skin.. "
Me: *Showing my face*
Mom: *Splat!*
Me: "Gooey Shit!"

2 days later
*Splat!*

3 days later
*Splat!*

Splatty splatty splat!!!!!!!!!

Pedicures
Flash news: I have ugly feet.. need to get them 'cleaned' at the parlour. Atleast this is a pleasurable process.. so no problem. :-)

Nailpolish
Something I have to do to make my self look girly. Not only is the damn thing hard to apply.. it chips off in 2 days and I have to use colors to make myself look girly in different ways!

Hair care
God has blessed me with not so nice hair too. Everytime there's a stupid function I've got to sit in the parlour and let them fix my hair. 45 mins! pulling and tugging. Plus Rs.400 :-(

Scaly skin
Answer - Pumice Stone. Rubbing a stone on ur ankles and feet is not exactly fun. That too everyday!

Creams
My favorite part! Why do they have 10,000 skin creams dammit??? I dont even know what those things do! There's mosituriser, there's body lotion, there's a day cream, a night cream, there's a toner, there's cleansing milk, there's a face pack, there's a scrub, there's a hydrating cream, there's a make-up removing cream..... I dont even know the names of the rest! And I need to use these things for glowing skin.. plus there are a 1000 brands that seem the same to me! Graaaaaaaaaah!!!

Make-up
Another favorite area. Eye-liner, kajal, mascara, eye-shadow, eye-lash curler.. Do you stupid boys know how difficult it is to apply eye-liner and kajal??? Its irritating! Lipstick, lip liner, gloss, plus I have to match these colors with my stupid outfit. Foundation, concealer, blush, feels like sandpaper on my face.. too much makes me look like a plastic doll.. too less.. well whats the point??!

Footwear, Clothes, Accessories
Co-ordination.. big time must! Else .. walking fashion disaster. What do I know about fashion?? Umm.. well :-)

Allergy
I have freakin sunlight allergy! I am allergic to sunlight! Why cant I be allergic to shellfish?? Why sunlight? Which means even if its 44 degress C, I need to wear a jacket to cover my hands and neck and carry an umbrella to protect my face wherever I go. I forget one of these.. and I get these pretty looking eruptions.. all over the exposed area! Once again.. thanks for tht too god!

Bags
Fashionable or not.. Screw u.. I'll only carry a backpack.

Its sad.. that despite the fact that we hate you.. we still do all of the above and more.. Just to look good for you. Stupid boys.. I hate you all!

..p..

My personal dictionary

'Random Access' had commented on one of my posts saying I should make a dictionary.. since I have a few favorite words and I keep using them over and over again. That's very true. In fact, my friends are so used to my vocab.. that one day I used the word 'uncouth' and a friend of mine stared at me wide-eyed and open-mouthed. She was like "You dont use such words.. Why did you use 'uncouth'"? I said "Well.. it seemed apt considering the situation". She said "Still.. its you!!" WTF!

So I decided to jot down a few of the words I use when I speak .. These are the words that come outta my mouth atleast 20 times a day:

• Worst (To be pronounced as 'Wuuurstu')
• Bitch
• What the.. !
• Shut up ya!
• Overacting
• Bilady
• Fuckpot (My altered version of crackpot)
• Mad eh?
• Yes eh?
• Useless!

I realized that most of my favorites are abuses. Well.. that's me :D

..p..

PDA

PDA = Public Display of Affection

Adding to my share auto experiences is this wonderful concept of PDA. Let me the explain the logistics part of it. The last seat in the share auto is a 4 seater. Primarily, women are seated there and its pretty cramped up.. so 4 of us can just about park our butts on the seat. Day before yesterday, I was going back home around 7. Aided by the dimly lit auto and otherwise dull evening, I didnt know there was someone taking advantage of this situation. I was strategically positioned in the seat. I had one lady on the right, and one girl on my left and a guy sitting next to her. The guy and the girl were cosily cuddled in the corner and what did they do??

What didn't they do?? There are 12 people in the auto shifting uncomfortably in the seat but these idiots were least bothered. Their palms were glued together. She keeps thrusting herself on him. Suddenly she will kiss his shoulder. Then he realizes that he has to return the kiss.. so he kisses her head. Our hero also suddenly realizes that in a share auto with deafening background music.. he needs to whisper some sweet nothings into her ear. Our heroine is no less a drama queen.. she is quite suddenly overcome by drowsiness. She has to sleep on his lap. sleep disappears in 75 seconds ans she is up again. Hero agains whispers something in her ear to make her blush. Even if the share auto swerves a bit to the right/left, they fall on each other like the damn thing is going to tilt. All this while the hands are glued.. mind it.

I mean 'What the fuck!!?' Bloody find a dark corner on some street and make out man!! Else take an auto and distract the driver with ur coochie cooing.. why the hell do you idiots have to travel in a share auto and make everyone uncomfortable?? Atleast for the sake of the old people in the auto. I am totally not against PDA but this was freakin' lust.. not love! It was like.. where can I feel you further?? and they were totally oblivious to the fact that there are so many other people in the auto!

Stop using love/lust as an excuse for acting stupid socially!! Rotten numbskulls! Get a room for god's sake!

..p..

I take thee as my lawfully wedded wife/husband only if.....

Marriage .. for that matter, even love has become a business dealing now. It is like one company trying to acquire another. only if conditions a,b,c .. z are satisfied. Let me list down some common criteria:

What a 'girl' necessarily wants from the 'guy'

• Guy must be from the U.S - They dont care if the recession is rampant there.. he has to be from the U.S. Not Malaysia.. not Dubai .. not Australia.. only U.S.A. Some go to the extent of saying.. he should be from New York or Chicago.. I dont like Seattle/timbuktoo because aunty next door says the malls are not good there. Soon the condition will go like this I want a guy living in California in Maple avenue.. 1st floor preferable.. in a 3 bedroom apartment.


• Guy must have a flat in the heart of the city - The girl doesnt want him to have a house.. coz that would require a lot of domestic work.. cleaning.. maintaining et all. In the heart of the city, facing the street with centralized a/c. What about the ones who have a flat which is not facing the street? Inelegible bachelors?? Tough luck boys


• Guy must be working in an IT company - Many dont even know what the expansion of IT is. Its jus something thats got to do with the computer. So if a watchman is looking out for a girl, if he is the watchman for an IT company, he is hot property. Apparently only people employed in IT companies can sustain the 'luxurious' lifestyles of these women.. whatever that means.


• Guy must earn minimum 60,000 p.m and must have onsite opportunities in plenty - So guys who earn 59,999 p.m .. you are rejected.. next time perhaps!


• Guy's mother should be dead.. and preferably no sisters - This is to avoid the problem of in-laws torture. So if your mom/sis is alive.. kill them! Else you aint getting nothing.


• Guy should have atleast 2 credit cards (one of which will land up in the girl's purse ultimately) - What if the guy has 5 credit cards and no money? So much for logic. Good luck with the card payment guys!


• Guy must have good wheels - A chauffeur driven Honda civic atleast.. it does'nt matter of she was travelling by a share auto before getting married, but travelling in anything below a Civic will harm her skin.. you know.. UV rays..tch tch.


• Guy must be able to fund overseas trips every now and then - She didnt have a passport till she got married.. but it is mandatory after marriage for pleasure trips necessarily abroad.

What a 'guy' necessarily wants from the 'girl'

• Girl should be fair - If she is dark, he would'nt be able to identify her when the sun sets.. therefore, she needs to be fair.. even of he is the color of a crow.


• Girl should be from a 'good' family - 'good' here implies a rich father-in-law, tons of property in her name and tons of dowry


• Girl's family should be supportive - This means.. if the guy is ever thrown out from his job, father-in-law must give hard cash of 20 lakhs to help him start his new business.


• Girl must be decent - She should not have any 'guy' friends.. ever! If she does, her character is tainted!


• Girl must be independent - She must be employed.. in a 9-5 job.. earn just lesser than the hubby and come back home.. cook.. clean.. everything. Basically, she must be around when he leaves work, and be back when he is back and look fresh as ever. Whereas even if his office is next door, will come back looking like a doped monkey. If by any chance she is late, she will be accused of being involved in 'unscrupulous' activities. Fair enough!

Whatever happened to working hard together and making it big?? Its all about convenience now. Enetering into nuptials with a guarantee that life will materliastically get better. I like the word spinster.. sounds nice doesn't it?? :-)

..p..

Men give stupid excuses to act like the idiots they are! X-(

Random facts about me? no no.. about her

There is this tag going on in facebook - 25 random things about me. I took it up and out it up on facebook. Yesterday when I was talking to one of my best buds, I was telling her about the tag and she was like I dont have some random things about me to describe. I said why not and started rattling off stuff about her. She was like 'What the.. !! How do you know all this about me??' I said 'Err.. I am your best bud..that's why.'

Therefore I decided I will write as many random things I know of her as possible. Just a twist of the original tag :-)

Here goes!

1. She is a very good listener. She can listen your problems/gossip/banter for hours and not complain about how boring it is.
2. She can remember faces that she has seen just for a few mins for years. Unfortunately the other person barely recognizes her ;-)
3. She has a strange bag and show fetish.
4. She once ate 25 bajjis at one go!!!
5. She likes unattractive geeky guys. Very unattractive. Very geeky!
6. She can never grow her hair beyond her shoulders. It is apparently 'too long' beyond that :P
7. She believes she has her grandmom's skin. Literally.
8. She can watch sitcoms continuosly. She finished the entire 'Wonder Years' series in 2 days!
9. She is incredibly forgetful. She has still not given the gifts that she had bought for her Chris child (Chrismom-child game) that we played in std XII. Its been 6 years!
10. She likes any kind of movies. The trashiest movie will appeal to her. So my opposite!
11. She is very spontaneous. Suddenly she will want to go on a road trip. If anyone acknowledges and says 'Okay lets go', he/she is her new best friend.
12. In her final year of under-graduation, she did not attend even one class. When she went to collect one of her exam papers, she had no clue who was teaching what subject that she asked her auditing prof for her IT paper.
13. She speaks the most local tam I can imagine. Autowaala slang. Annande.. innande (Here.. there)
14. She loves seafood.
15. She is very opinionated! Highly!
16. She is very non-girly. She will never take care of her skin.. even if a crater develops on it.
17. She forgets birthdays. Specifically another close bud of ours. She once called me a day after my birthday and wished me.. claiming that she was right .. and that my birthday was on the day she called. I was like 'Huh'?
18. Even if she has 20 days to study for one paper, she will study only the night before the exam.. till 4 in the morning.
19. She gets carried away easily.
20. Her best friend is me :-) I think I am the only person who knows everything about her.
21. She once got so depressed that she just preferred spending time alone in a dark room. This was for almost a month!

21 things is not bad!! Will try and make it 25.. Not able to think anymore now. I know you pretty well :-) see!

..p..

Friends and non-friends

There's this deep desire in me to write a book someday. And the book will be titled 'Friends and non-friends'. I dont know why I thought of that name.. But I know what the content will be -Men/Guys/Boys/Males whatever the term maybe.

Non-Friends

1. I have had my share of relationships, each distinct and entertaining in different ways. Though I invested a lot of emotions in them, treading back in time is pretty wonderful. I would like to write about pataofying styles/the fun part/the friends that came as a result of association/the sad part/the love/the start/the end and of course repercussions. My favourite part is of course the pataofying and the repercussions!


2. Also featuring in the non-friends categories are guys who had a thing for me which I came to know about either directly/indirectly.


3. Guys who didnt know whether they had a thing or not.


4. Enemies. (That list is growing)

Friends

Guys who have been super wonderful pals, who knew just where to draw the line, always gave me a shoulder to cry on and those who stood by me through thick and thin. The ones in this category are very few. So I assume the 'Non-Friends' part is going to be the interesting part. Actually I am sure.. that its going to be the fun part. :-)

So when you buy the book and you find the 'Friends' part torn off, dont be sad. The juicy part is intact. If its the other way around (Non-friends part is torn off), return the book. Not worth buying!

I know saying things like 'No regrets' is cool.. but the when you do have the guts to travel back in time and look at yourself.. and learn from your experiences, you are strong! I am tying to be. So I am uncool .. I have no funky punchlines.. atleast I am learning :-)

And when I become a superstar overnight because of my book, punchlines will be lifted from my book. So dont criticize me.. instead be smart and take autographs in advance before I get/act pricey :D

..p..

Share auto

I dont know who came up with the idea of a share auto. Bloody brilliant I say. Worked out in my favor. I travel in about 30 bux as my cumulative expenditure to and fro. To a normal auto I would have to shell out 180 bux per day!! So Mr.Share auto concept inventor, aapko mera salaam :-)

Everyday I travel in this three wheeled contraption and it is quite an experience. Not in a good way or a bad way.. but through this journey, I come across such different types of people. Of course I have to ignore the mind rattling noise and the constant shoving and pushing of the fat aunty sitting almost always 'co-incidentally' next to me! What am I ?? Do I have a board on my head that says 'Feel free to sit next to me and squeeze my ass to pulp'??? Apparently I do :-(

I guess I have seen almost all the types of drivers that are out there.. The grumpy ones, the friendly ones, the 'dont argue with me .. I am GOD' ones, the polite ones (RARE as hell!), the rash ones, the not so rash ones, the 'I love potholes.. so I am gonna give you guys a bumpy ride' ones and the tortoises (who dont even need an excuse to slow down). Personally, I dont even know which ones I like. Each one suits my convenience according to my need to reach the destination.

People in the auto.. Well, its an ocean! So many different kinds of people.

• The accomodating ones - However little space there is, the try and create some more for u, so u can be comfortable.
• The barkers - They act like the share auto runs only for them. They dont like it when he stops to pick up another passenger on the way. The instantaneously start hurling abuses.
• The rocks - They dont move!!! They just sit near the entrance, whether they get down in the last stop or the next stop. They refuse to freakin budge!
• The ploppers - The people who fall under this category just dont care how much place they have, they will just plop themselves so hard that their ass is literally on your hand! They will conveniently squeeze themselves even into half an inch and make others manage with minimalistic space.
• They homos - In a 4 seater, even if two get down, they will be stuck to you. They will not move and make space. They love u for the wrong reasons. Yuck
• The liberalists - These women under the pretext of being totally open to the concept of men and women sharing a seat, squeeze the poor man into the corner and make him so self conscious of his vulnerability that the guy is forced to get down in the next stop. Talk about adam-teasing!

It is quite wonderful to come across so many people and develop likes/dislikes in a matter of 30 minutes. Quite a harrowing experience as well coz u need to cling on to your dear life to survive the journey :-) All I can say is Hail Share Autos and Cheers to an experience that is LIFE!

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Leave letter

Dear Blog readers,

As I am suffering from a nasty cold, I request permission to take a day off from blogging. Achoooo!

Yours,
Priya
Counter-signed,
Priya's mom

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The curious case of Benjamin Button

I watched the movie last night and I liked it. The movie is pretty long.. 2 and half hours to be precise. But I think the director needed that time to fully convey the essence of the character. Every character holds some significance to Benjamin .. The woman who plays the piano, the man who gets hit by lightining, Queenie.. they all add up to his personality. The summation of their experiences makes Benjamin a better person.

The character has beautifully evolved from a child trapped in the body of an old man to an old man trapped in the body of a child. The fact that Benjamin is fully aware of his condition is reflected in his maturity when he decides to leave his wife and kid.

Pros:

• Brad Pitt..Brad Pitt..Brad Pitt..Brad Pitt..Brad Pitt..Brad Pitt..!!!! He is hot when he grows younger.. simply HOT!


• Brilliant acting by almost everyone. Even the little girl who plays Daisy.


• Good casting


• Well written dialogues.


• Interesting plot.


• Incredible make-up!! Highly applaudable.

Cons:

• Length of the movie. Which also is not a con... as I said, you need that much time to understand the character.

Oscar material for sure. I think its high time Leonardo Di Caprio and Brad Pitt win an oscar. They are highly talented actors. Plus they are deliciously hot! Next year perhaps.

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The weekend and then on

As usual, I will give my random weekend updates. In no particular order whatsoever. So dont try to understand the chronology/priority.

• Friday was a total waste of time. Oh Friday doesnt count as the weekend .. oh well :)
• Managed to sort out issues of weirdness with a colleague. Happiness I say!
• Went for 'body servicing' (read - parlour/waxing et all). The road to beauty and all tht jazz aint so pretty you know. And 'someone' said, "you do this as a routine.. how can it still hurt?" All I wanted to say was "Screw u!!!" X-(
• I realized that I am an incredibly short-tempered person. I keep shutting myself out or walking away from people. Not a good sign. Time to attain nirvana. Where's my halo?? Someone bring me my halo please!
• Started watching Benjamin Button last night. Movie is long and slow, but interesting. Great make-up and acting. Half way through. Review should be up tomorrow.
• I cannot apply nail polish for nuts! It looks like a 3 year old trying to draw the sun. Atleast that looks cute.. My piece of art looks crappy!
• Witnessed a scary accident. Thank god noone was injured!
• Violent guys are a huge turn on for me. Maybe I need therapy? Again this realization dawned upon me this weekend.
• Its getting too HOT HOT HOT! I wish it will snow here someday.

That's all.. you guys can go now! :-) How much happens over a weekend huh?

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P.S - No television wars this weekend. TV conked out :P

Mixed Reactions

Yesterday(Thursday) was an incredible day. Not in a good way or in a bad way. Just incredible. So many things happened and I just did not have sufficient time to react. By the end of every hour, I was unsure if I am supposed to be elated or sad. Now that's a real sorry state.. not knowing what expression you must have.. But that is exactly how I was yesterday. Till I slept.

What happened yesterday:

1. I come to office and boom!! .. there is a scary looking e-mail. By the looks of it, I was almost sure I will be fired. Pondered over it for the rest of the day. (Peeing in pants)


2. A colleague behaves weirdly so weird that its hard to not notice. Not that I didnt have my part to play in the sitaution. But, it was hitting me.. at some level. (Irritated)


3. Incidentally, other colleagues of mine seem uncannily friendly. (Confused)


4. My brother who was not talking to me for a while, suddenly popped an email. (Surprised)


5. A minute later he calls. (Happy :-))


6. My TL confesses that noone else got an e-mail like what I got. (Pee'd more in pants)


7. Brother again sends me an e-mail. (Happy :-))


8. Had a very nice chat with another colleague of mine. (Surprised)


9. My boss finally tells me that the e-mail is a good thing.. and not a bad thing. (Fucking relieved!) yay! I was not getting fired!


10. Went home happy only to see that 'someone' was not talking properly. (Pissed)

Finally when I got home, I was too damn tired to decide what expression I was supposed to have. So zzzzzzzz......

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P.s - Weekend is here.. time for television wars (brother and dad) ! Let me grab my popcorn :P

Simple movies.. that manage to leave a mark

I barely get to watch tv. Thanks to my dad and brother. In the mornings I barely have time to watch and in the evening, it is already taken by my dad. Weekends are the best. I get to watch territorial wars between my brother and my dad to get control of the precious remote. Since my dad is out of town, the TV is all mine. All mine I tell you. Mine! Mine! Mine!!! Muhahahha... Well that's only till tonight though. Sigh.

Anyways, getting back to the point. Yesterday I was watching Notting Hill starring Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant. Its such a simple and beautiful movie. Its a cliched story. But what really hit a home run was the highly well thought-off dialogues. Its so full of sarcasm, funny metaphors and well basically its my kind of subtle humor. Throughout the movie, the dialogues are so apt. None out of place.. All managing to convey the meaning perfectly. It helps you get back in touch with the romantic side in you.

Also, I like Hugh Grant's outfits.. simple pink and blue shirts that suit him sooooooo well *Drool*.

I just liked the movie so much and enjoyed it bcoz there was no 'I wanna watch the National Geographic Channel' or 'Put Sun Music' or 'Maanada Mayilada' or some unnecessary requests of that sort. The TV was all MINE :-). I was at peace.

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A 1 and a 2 and 3 4 5

Everytime I watch a movie particularly English ones, I admire the perfectly toned bodies that the heroines have. Its fantastic. No flab anywhere. Perfectly toned legs, curves with no extra flesh hanging anywhere (except where it counts that is ;-)). They can carry off any kinda outfit. I remember when I was watching transformers, the heroine was in a mini skirt and the hero ogles at her as she fixes his car. I dont care if they have gone under the knife or anything, its not impossible to get that kind of body.. Is it???

Irrespective of the mockery and the impossibility of all this happening, I have decided. I am joining Aerobics classes! There.. Maybe i wont become transformer's heroine :P But atleast little little shapely will suffice.

..p..

The weekend and then on..

Random Updates:

• Another friend of mine saw Delhi-6 and expressed a strong urge to throw shoes at the screen to show her disgust.


• Went to besant nagar beach yday.. not that I dont know that its dirty, but yday was incredibly dirty. It was like they were celebrating dirty sunday. Eew!


• The power was off on saturday at work. So we were declared half day off! :)


• Its getting too bloody hot during the day. I need a sun resistant armor to protect whatever complexion I have. Meager as it already is.


• I am gonna drive the car every night to practise.. so I can take it to work. Enough of the share autos and crowded buses. And yes I am gonna start adding my quota to global warming. Sorry about that.


• Things are getting too complicated at home. Moral of the story - Humans are irritating.


• My tailor slightly screwed up my clothes. I look like Saroja Devi when I wear the kurtas. Maybe I will instigate a new trend in fashion. :-)


• I finally remember how to say sit down (respectfully) in Marwadi. Berawjo sa .. Yay! Awesomeness is came! :P


• Suddenly I am considering buying a car. With 2000 rupees in my bank account. I am an optimist. I know.

Thats all.. You all can go now :-)

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Delhi - 6

After watching a terrible movie like Vaaranam Aayiram (VA) from a fantastic director, I guess I thought things could not get worse. But it did! The movie that I dared to watch after VA was Delhi - 6 and damn I couldnt have made a worse choice. Vijay's movie would've been 10 times better. Now maybe that was a bit too harsh.. I take it back.. We all know nothing can be as bad as Vijay's movies :-)

The movie starts off with disconnects in the scenes which we assume will fall into place during the course of the movie which unfortunately doesnt happen even till the end credits start rolling. I felt the essence of the movie was very similar to that of Swades. But compares nothing to the original. Swades was a brilliant movie with brilliant screenplay and fantastic acting. The characters were strong and had distinct identities. Delhi - 6 has none of this.

Cons:

• Bad screenplay


• Terrible dialogues.. failed to create any impact whatsoever


• Subtle humor was intended.. turned out to be too subtle.


• Loose characters


• No coherence


• The love scenes had no depth


• Kaala bandhar was bloody overdone


• No sensible reasoning behind any of Abhishek's decisions
• I thought 'rehna tu' was a romantic song.. but it was playing even when Abhishek was talking to Rishi Kapoor or any body on the road for that matter. Am I mistaken or is this really a con??


• Whatever happened to Sonam Kapoor's dream of becoming the Indian Idol?

Pros:

• Sonam Kapoor's fresh face.

To sum it up.. the movie SUCKS! Just cannot believe its from the guy who made a movie as intense as Rang De Basanti.

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The dark cloud

Have you seen those looney tunes cartoons, especially the Daffy Duck ones where sometimes the sun is shining everywhere but a dark cloud accompanied by lightning follows him around? And however hard he tries, the cloud just doesn't go away.. Well I am Daffy Duck since yesterday. Yay me!

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My Clothes and Me!

I shop a lot. Not that like thats news for anyone who knows me - but just setting up the scene here. Thats me up there in the picture by the way :-).

So i buy these clothes and develop incredibly strong sentiments for/against them.

Scenario #1 - I hate it

I buy something that I completely love and it sleeps in my cupboard for eternity. Everytime I look at it, I despise it and just cannot get myself to wear it. Finally its goes towards charity. A fresh new piece of clothing.. just like that.

Scenario #2 - I love it too much

I wear it continuously till a black kurta becomes a shade of gray after frequent washing.

Scenario #3 - Its not good for me

I had a terrible day on Nov 12th, I have not worn those clothes after that. I am infact almost scared to touch it. It was one of my lucky outfits. Some luck that turned out to be.

Scenario #4- I think its good for me

I wear these outfits for every interview, every damn place where I need luck.

Scenario #5 - Someone hates it

If someone hates an outfit that I own, I end up liking it all the more and I feel like wearing it everytime I am going to meet that person :P (Thats jus the mean person in me)

So.. Is it just me ?? or is everyone like this?

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Ho Humm.. Another one

I know some loser will again hack into my account and delete my blog. So I am just gonna accept and expect it from the start so I am not surprised at any level.

Paying homage to my older blogs:

1. priyaunplugged.blogspot.com


2. priyaunwound.blogspot.com


3. screwd-up.blogspot.com


4. priyas.quicksilverhq


5. derangedconvention.blogspot.com

Now its blog #6. Hooray to my never say die spirit and bulging muscles! :D

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